Little did I know three months ago when I visited New York, that I would be back so soon, but here I am back in the city. At the end of July, I was admitted to NYU’s Draper Interdisciplinary Master’s Program. Since then, my life has been a whirlwind. I struggled to find housing without having to come out here. I knew nothing about living in the city. What neighborhoods are the safest? What should my expectations be? I considered searching for a roommate, and even contacted a couple of people. I just could not bring myself to sign a lease with someone I had never met. I took a risk and decided to use a broker. I had read horror stories of brokers stringing people along or overcharging or passing them off to others. Though I did get worried after apartments I was interested in became unavailable right when I decided that I wanted to go for it. Eventually, I did find a one bedroom apartment in Manhattan. It was a little more than what I was hoping for but my safety and comfort, I went with it. Unfortunately, I did not get the student discount I was hoping for, and the reason I chose the company in the first place, because my broker had to go through another broker from his company. That really frustrated me. The other broker did not want to reduce broker’s fee because he did not want to reduce the amount that he would make since he would already have to split it with my broker. So in one word: greed. The guy was not willing to give a student a break because of greed. Not only was I trying to find housing but then I was trying to figure out how to pay for school, what classes to take, and how to get myself and belongings there. Looking back I wish I had taken a step back and spent a little more time with my friends that I was only going to be around a few more weeks and obsessed a little less about my future. Though I know they were understanding and supporting of me, part of me still feels guilty.
At the of August, I took a one way flight with just a carry on. I stayed in a hotel for five days while I waited for my lease to start and for my parents to arrive with my brother’s truck and a small trailer with my belongings. During my wait, I had orientation for my program, did a graduate tour, attended a safety session, and went to the historical society museum with some people I met, and bought textbooks and other supplies. The same day my parents helped me move everything, I also had class. I go to the grocery store after class, which luckily is basically across the street. My head spins. The whole health food market is huge in the city, not that I have a problem with that, my problem was (and continues to be) the layout of the store. There is olive oil in three different locations. Finding anything is quite the challenge. Do they not have the 4 lb thing of peanut butter? I don’t think they understand exactly how much peanut butter I eat.
I had two classes the following day. Then I went grocery shopping again, for more than just enough for peanut butter and honey sandwiches and cereal and milk. I guess I have to be willing to pay this much for fresh produce. Where is the Kraft Macaroni and Cheese? $1.79 for a single box! I could not justify that. Where is the packs of four? Why is bulk not a thing?
So here I am trying to figure out campus. Where can I print? How can I print from my own computer? Can I even print from my own computer? As well as trying to figure out the city. Where is the nearest pharmacy that I can use? Where is a doctor that is in my insurance network? Where do I get renter’s insurance? Where can I get a futon and have it delivered? Where can I do my own laundry? (Seriously, people pay to have other people do their laundry. I find this rather bizarre mostly since I feel like doing one’s own laundry is part of becoming an adult.) Speaking of being an adult, I had to go ask my upstairs neighbors how to use my gas stove, which with my severe dislike of fire, I have a love-hate relationship with. I love that I can use it to cook, I hate that involves a giant flame with gas. I honestly can’t help but view it as a giant Bunsen burner.
My first weekend I discovered the free NYU bus routes, two of which have stops just a block or two away. That was my best discovery. Since my discovery, I have been taking advantage of it. Though I don’t mind the walk, in fact it can be quite nice. Knowing that I have that for raining or cold days or at night is nice. I like being outside but for me there is something missing. I miss grass. I am a fan of cooler colors including green, but I find myself liking green more and more because it reminds me of grass. I hope to go to Central Park and spend the day reading sometime this weekend.
I soon learn that IKEA is the only place that delivers. Delivery is how much to Manhattan? Well, I don’t really have a choice. I will just call and tell them what I want and have it delivered. After half an hour on hold, I am informed that I cannot place orders over the phone and physically have to go to the store. Great, now I have to find out how to get to Brooklyn. I eventually have to IKEA double check on which sofa bed I want and look another item in the very beginning of the show floor. Then of course have to go through the entire rest of the show floor before getting to go down to where I can actually pull the merchandise. Then I have to wait in line to pay, wait in line to give my purchases to home delivery, and then wait in line to pay for my home delivery. I spent more time waiting in lines at IKEA than I did doing my shopping.
I remember that there is a Target in Brooklyn. I had been dying to go to Target so I figured why not? After beginning to walk the wrong direction a block, I turn around and several blocks later I make it to the mall with the Target. It was busier than any Target I had ever been to, with the except of opening time on Black Friday. Still it was Target. I grab a basket. Alright, if I can carry it in this basket, I can carry it on the subway with me. I go to the food section. Boxes of fruit strips. Jumbo box of fruit snacks. Reasonably priced popcorn. My four packs of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese. I strategically place my items in my basket and carry the box of fruit snacks. At the checkout, it is only three bags. I don’t think I have ever been more happy to shop at a Target in my life. I was desperate. It was worth having to carry those three bags on the subway. That was also the only time I was thankful that they double bag everything here. Seriously, everything gets double bagged. I bought stuff from Bed, Bath, and Beyond today and was double bagged…and I was going to put it in the cart that I bought.
My desperate purchase from Target
I have always taken pride in feeling like I have never experienced culture shock. Yes, I have struggled with reverse culture, adjusting back to life after getting back from travel, but never adjusting to the place I was traveling. If I had to describe my experience of moving New York City in one word or phrase, it would be culture shock. Part of me wonders if it the feeling of permanence of being here because I do not know when I will get to go to the place I call home. Culture shock has been taking a number on me. I struggle with insomnia. Some days I struggle with bouts of depression. At times, everything seems overwhelming. Sometimes, I question my decision to attend NYU and move to the city and I feel like I have made a huge, expensive mistake. I am trying to adjust to a new school in a new city. I am balancing classes with adjusting to the city with trying to find a job with course work with adjusting to school.
The biggest struggle is finding a sense of belonging. When people ask where I live, I still say “I’m from Iowa.” When what they are really asking is where in the city do I live? After acquiring a sofa bed over the weekend, my apartment finally feels homey. However, a sense of belonging is deeper than that. Yes, I have made a few friends. I’ve met people in Draper and my classes. I have gone way out of my comfort zone and gone to events in an effort to put myself out there and meet more people, but I can only socialize like that for so long. Often time these gatherings for NYU involve wine, or at least the graduate and Draper ones do, not that I have a problem with that, I love wine, but it was just kind of surprising. Attend this graduate reception for the library in the 8th floor reading room, here is some food and wine. Part of me wonders how successful these events would be if it were not for all the free food and wine. I digress. A sense of belonging is search I am willing to pursue, but I realize it won’t happen overnight. I need to be patient and give myself time. One of the reasons I wanted to come to school here was the opportunities that the city would have and experience of living in a city.
A picture of my apartment
View from the 10th floor reading room of the library, I could used to this.
